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Topic for discussion
| Polygamy hosted by Administrator |
| Mifumi, a women's rights organisation has petitioned the Constitutional Court to declare polygamy unconstitutional because it undermines the equality between men and women. What is your view? |
| (96 posts) Post your opinion View Latest Posts |
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Posts (Latest First)
| primitive authored by Kusubira on 26. June 2010 at 16:46 |
| Anthropological meaning ,before cultural ties so and so...but why choose church. Convergences are sought and exploited in order to bolster existing principles or projects[Gupta 1974] eternity is a prayer in project. |
| Oh Brother! authored by dj tupac on 25. June 2010 at 21:29 |
| What about the fundermental freedom of choice? The separation of church and state inclusive of our cultural belief and heritage! The right to choose is sanctified and has nothing to do with equality between men and women. It should be constitutional for a woman to marry more than one man therefore, now that is fair. |
| feminist authored by Kusubira on 25. June 2010 at 00:35 |
| It is said that white femine movement like its counterpart is about oppression and gain,within capitalism.Piety conceived as a very feminine trait, is in contrast to the limits;considering the destructive nature of unregulated female sexuality[Wessinger 1996]. Feminism agenda has no vocation with priesthood. |
| I'VE HEARD YOU, Bhuka Bijumiro-Jjumiro. BUT SISTERS WHERE ARE YOU? authored by muhesi on 27. April 2010 at 10:54 |
That’s the reality as you have eloquently presented it. Western education, to the less witty Africans looks as superior, what a contradiction!
Fellow Africans wake up, western ideology fooled our ancestors. They surrendered all our wealth for a nickel. Our human resources, land and sovereignty was given away cheaply by failing to spot concealment presented to them in the name of religion and materialism.
These advocates of women rights are agents of white superiority. They will sell their own souls for ill formulated research of European ideology. Monogamy is a Christian doctrine which is very un-African. These Christian doctrines are constantly being revised by the same people who have preached to us for 200 yrs, what they never practised. So why should we always take them seriously? Notice the church’s position on, catholic priests’ child abuses, and homosexuality.
Polygamy has got its pros and cons. Let this debate be left to Africans to discuss at local level without any threat from legislators flashing their knowledge of western bias that has for 300 years demonised African civilisation! There are more important issues to be handled by law makers like poverty, diseases, food security and girl protection from malpractices of genital mutilation. Monogamy is not the panacea of women’s justice.
Research on social studies makes no correlation between monogamy and family values. In fact most men in monogamous marriages have extra marital desires, resulting from Christian imposed vows. Most women in monogamy know that their husbands given the opportunity will cheat than remain faithfull. Have you not heard of maids and sister in-laws having a bit of fun in a monogamous home? It’s inherent in men to have more than one!
The African culture of polygamy still triumphs over European model s on matters of family cohesion.
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| polygamy authored by Nkamwesiga Fred Ruhinda on 27. April 2010 at 10:09 |
| Honestly speaking,my verdict on whether women should get married to a man wiyh more than one wife is totally in agreement with the current Mifumu women constitutional proposal.I have three sisters and happen to be their only brother ,I would not at any one time agree to a man's proposal to marry any of my sisters.its totally out of hand and i urge any of my counterparts out there to dissapprove the idea.thank you.Nkamwesiga Fred Ruhinda. |
| Where Polygamy is a Mutual Decision authored by Bhuka Bijumiro-Jjumiro on 24. April 2010 at 20:05 |
I was born and brought up in a polygamous home environment. My father had married more than or a total of nine women (eight of whom were my stpe mothers). These step mothers produced many of my brothers and sisters whom according to the western cuture are not my brothers or sisters by my step-brothers or step-sisters. I say to make a distinction between African Culture which is inclusive and more brotherly/sisterly than european culture which is discriminative/exclusive and more inclined to selfishness rather than the generosity of the African mindset hence the African extended family system.
Polygamy is by nature supposed to be a mutual decision between a married man and his first wife. Without the consent or permission of the senior wife, a man would not take on a second wife and without the consent of his first two wives he would not take on a third wife. This is where polygamy is a mutual decision whereby the new wife knowns well in advance that she is being married into polygamy.
The constitutionality of polygamy is right and permissible where there is mutual consent; where all parties involved agree to the decision and live with it in mutual understanding and or consent. Polygamy is the kind of customary marriage in which I have had all my beautiful children who love one another and treat and regard each other as brothers and sisters. Their mothers know and help each and often work on the same projects together with mutual respect.
In order to undertsnd polygamy better, one needs to get to know its dynamics or reasons; how it comes about. In my personal research and investigation, there appears to be FOUR basic reasons that give rise to polygamy and these are:
a) A natural cultural condition where there are more females than males and the right for every female to have a family or a right to a marriage. In the absence of polygamy, most women have resorted to lesbianisn in all the western or so-called developed countries as it is the nature of the human mind to seek companionship. If every man marries one wife, there is naturally a big number of women who remain unmarried and therefore deprived of the right to a married home and a natural right to have and raise children in a married home environment.
If the Africans of today choose to follow the way of the western countries, lesbianism will be on the rise throughout Africa as that will be the natural response and reaction by most women. In most African countries, there are many more females than males.
By nature, every woman seeks to have a marriage companion and to make it a law to outlaw polygamy is to deny these mostly village women the right to personal joy and the pursuit of happiness in a marriage environment.
Women who go into polygamy are adult individuals who choose to do so of their own. To deny them this birth-right would be an attack on their right to freedom of choice and the pursuit of happiness as a minority group. In fact those who seek to make polygamy illegal will one day face the negative effects of such illegality when the un-married wowen will come forth and demend their right to marriage.
b) Some women who are by nature "generous and merciful" are known to ask their husbands to marry a second wife rather than have to see their men indulge is sexual misconduct in extra-marriage escapades as is usuallythe case with the so many monogamous men we see and know in Uganda.
Usually, this comes about as a result of three factors: one) where the man's sexual libido is extra powerful that the wife fails to contain his demands and the man does not want to inudlge in extra-marital relations. two) where the wife happens to be sickly and less inclined to the marriage game; not wishing to deprive her man, she asks the husband to find a co-wife for her. This is usually the case when many women go into menopause and tend to loose their sexual drive.
In fact some females actually choose their co-wives. three) the economic factor. It is usually, traditionally true that polygamous homes have always been richer than many average homes where monogamy has been practiced. Marrying more than one wife made the home and family bigger in numbers of family members but also bigger in their economic output. Hence, polygamy could be permissible where the family is rich as to adequately provide for all of the family members. In Islam, a man must be able to support all his wives materially, emotionally and religiously.
c) The religious right as in Islam.
The African inferiority complex where some people in Africa seek to be copycats of everything White and every White man's ways or traditions. While both polygamy and monogamy have their disadvantages, the disadvantages of monogamy have proved to be more and worse than those of polygamy over time.
Consider for example the following: crimes committed by women towards women mainly stemming from that monogamous tradition where women grow up knowing that they own the husband- a element of possessiveness and blind attachment; crimes against children born out of wedlock, commited by married women who discover their husbands' extra marital affairs; negative magic practices against women who are seen as competitors by wives in monogamous marriages, the condoning of prostitution around the world stems from monogamous system of marriage as it gives rise to numbers of unmarried women who then seek joy with married men in hotels and lodges.
Venereal or STDs are more prevalent in peoples who claim to be monogamous but having extra marital relationships. Isn't it better for a man to have his two or three wives than be monogamous but having extra marital sex with many different unknown females with no upper limit. I know of some men who told me that they can count beyond 400-500 sexual partners. Yet these men were outwardly monogamous! They told me they could not even remember their faces if they met them on the streets of Kampala. Such hypocrisy!
Increasing prostitution is the direct and indirect making of monogamy as it denies many women the birth right to marriage and the pursuit of marriage joy and happiness.
Most women groups or women individuals who seek to outlaw polygamy are the product of western education who have been brainwashed by their western-minded trainers, one) to believe that everything African is either wrong or satanic; two) to believe that everything White people do is the right and Godly but that everything African is negative and demonic.
If it were not this kind of colonial and monogamous mentality, these "Mifumi" women's group would be seeking to amend the Constitution to legalize polygamy because they know deep at heart that our society is by nature polygamous. Even most of those Christian men we see who attend Church every Sunday have children outside of their Christian marriages or, continually have extra-marital games they play behind curtains. They were restrained by religion but internally they are by nature polygamous and have no self-control over their sexual libido.
If it happens to be that polygamy undermines the equality between men and women in Ugandan my suggestion would be that the Ugandan Parliament/ Lawmakers enact a constitutional amendment to that effect and legalize polygamy where it is a mutual decision between a man and his marriage companions.
e) Most lesbians ate western trained females. This is the gift they are now bringing back with them to Africa. Lesbianism is the prize they have adopted from western culture and so they want to destroy the moral fibre in Africa traditions at any cost.
The next thing we shall see on the increase throughout Uganda, Africa are, one) Single Mothers and two) many children raised without fathers who will then end up in prisons because of crimes which is the worst byproduct of single motherhood in the developed countries.
I call upon all Ugandans both women and men to oppose this women's group agenda to outlaw polygamy. Think of the many women who will lose their marriages and homes when such a law is enacted in Uganda. What program will MIFUMI initiate to rehabilitate these women and to accord them the joy they have been having in marriage other than lesbianism and prostitution on the streets and hotels and lodges of our towns? Think of the many children who will thenn grow up knowing they are bastards because they were torn away from their parents' marriage homes by such a law?
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| African culture prevails over of crusaders of western ideals masked as human rights! authored by muhesi on 17. April 2010 at 09:39 |
Dear Africans take no lectures from human rights groups whose only motive is to transform our culture to the hollow western models. Too much decadence is spreading in Africa from these human rights crusaders e.g. homosexuality, indispline in family and school, failed community, failed marriage respect for elders, all in the name of equality!!
These groups hanker to anything from West. I live in UK and believe me here, immorality is rife, in homes, schools, to streets. Indecent dressing is from parents, children, teachers and sexuality is everywhere, that’s equality and freedom.
I agree on the other hand that polygamy is unfair but so is life! If two parties consent to such a life then it’s no body's business to interfere. If an aggrieved party cannot have it, they should walk, and the law should support them.
An advice to our sisters; please don’t put up with what you dislike, it could cost your life! There are plenty of singles with similar interests.
Don’t be fooled by human rights groups, to them its just another well paid job!
OK Muhesi |
| One man at a time authored by Solome Nagadya on 16. April 2010 at 11:51 |
| I agree with Mifumi! Marry once and give it your best shot, and you will be happy! Polygamy degrades women and creates miserable people out of often mistreated children. Marriage should be sacred and to one person only, until death or proper divorce. |
| Polygamy- Not the Problem! authored by LUBEGA JULIUS on 16. April 2010 at 09:03 |
In Uganda today the debate is on so many things. Ranging from the 2011 Elections, Homosexuality and now Polygamy.
To the other subjects of discussion the concern is right! But to Polygamy it is just being taken out of context. This is one of the moves by the so called Women activists where by they feel that in such marriages women will always have a little say. Looking back at our African tradition who does not know that Polygamy has been existing successfully and that to most of us are as a product of such marriages. Do we realize that in such time marriages were very stable as compared to today where divorce is like sipping a Norvida.
The debate should not be on whether Polygamy should be abolished but how such marriages can be upheld for the heritage of our culture.
To Christians like me that might sound controversial, as Christian to be specific Catholic one man for one woman is the way to go and for the sake of heaven that's what we'll do. Our task now is to preach to the Polygamists about monogamous marriages but not to draft a civil law to handle this.
Lubega Julius Begumisa lubjuls@yahoo.com |
| Polygamy- Not the Problem! authored by LUBEGA JULIUS on 16. April 2010 at 09:02 |
In Uganda today the debate is on so many things. Ranging from the 2011 Elections, Homosexuality and now Polygamy.
To the other subjects of discussion the concern is right! But to Polygamy it is just being taken out of context. This is one of the moves by the so called Women activists where by they feel that in such marriages women will always have a little say. Looking back at our African tradition who does not know that Polygamy has been existing successfully and that to most of us are as a product of such marriages. Do we realize that in such time marriages were very stable as compared to today where divorce is like sipping a Norvida.
The debate should not be on whether Polygamy should be abolished but how such marriages can be upheld for the heritage of our culture.
To Christians like me that might sound controversial, as Christian to be specific Catholic one man for one woman is the way to go and for the sake of heaven that's what we'll do. Our task now is to preach to the Polygamists about monogamous marriages but not to draft a civil law to handle this.
Lubega Julius Begumisa lubjuls@yahoo.com |
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